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Posts Tagged ‘Women Are from Venus and So Are Their Horses’

 

 

HorseCode

“There were moments when all of a sudden, without any warning, my wife just switched from regular conversation to speaking in some unintelligible code,” writes Menno Kalmann in his hilarious book WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS AND SO ARE THEIR HORSES. “And it usually happened when horses were involved somehow.”

Anyone from outside the equestrian world who stumbles into a conversation betwixt riders (never intentionally, I might add), would freely admit that much of what is said might as well be a series of dots, dashes, blips, and clicks, for all the sense it makes. But of course, it rarely occurs to us just how funny (both “ha ha” and “strange”) it all sounds.

“I find myself sauntering over to our backyard arena and seeing my wife bounding around, clinging to her beloved nag,” Kalmann goes on. “‘He’s a bit lame, don’t you think?’ she says. I hesitate to answer this as I watch them. Who am I to judge? I’m sure she finds some of the things I like to do pretty lame as well.

“Later on, after unsaddling, she treats me to an elaborate debriefing on all the specifics. ‘He’s not in front of my leg, and he is constantly four-beat cantering.’ She’s definitely lost me there; I have no clue how to interpret this. ‘And, when he is going round, the hind legs—they keep falling out!’

“I gaze at her in desperation. Will I need to go out in the dark and search the arena for lost legs?

“Later on, as we sit in the car, she confides her intention of riding ‘forward and down’ for a bit. I can only applaud such a decision, the more so because I understand at least half of it. Forward riding has the advantage of seeing what’s in front of you, and going down seems wise enough as long as you’re not flying a Boeing over the Hudson.

“After a while, I was confident that I had pretty much mastered the vocabulary. For instance, I figured out that ‘collection’ doesn’t mean wanting to obtain as many horses as you can…”

Well, that, Mr. Kalmann, depends entirely on our mood and the day!

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WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS AND SO ARE THEIR HORSES is available from the TSB online bookstore, where shipping in the US is FREE. It is also available in epub and Kindle editions.

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Sales of e-readers were predicted to be astronomical this holiday season. TSB (HorseandRiderBooks.com) plans to make its bestselling list of equestrian books available in Kindle and epub formats.

Forecasters predicted that this would be the biggest Christmas ever for e-book readers under the tree. If Santa brought you one of the many reading devices now available and you’re wondering what your first e-book downloads should be, put a horse book at the top of your list!

Trafalgar Square Books, leading publisher of horse-related books and DVDs, is going digital. With a focus still on high quality, full-color print books, TSB can’t ignore the industry and social trends that tell us more and more people are reading books digitally. We want our authors—the top riders, trainers, and horse care experts in the world—and their tips, techniques, and ground-breaking methods to be available to a broad-range of equestrians, anywhere in the world.

TSB‘s backlist of bestselling horse books numbers in the hundreds, so we will be making titles available via e-book formats gradually, as we can. Currently, the following three books are available in Kindle and epub formats:

THE SMART WOMAN’S GUIDE TO MIDLIFE HORSES by Melinda Folse

LESSONS WELL LEARNED by Clinton Anderson

WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS AND SO ARE THEIR HORSES by Menno Kalmann

Kindle and epub formats of these three top-sellers can be purchased on Amazon.com and eBooks.com.

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Funny-man Menno Kalmann, the now famous “horse husband” and author of the hit comedic memoir Women Are from Venus and So Are Their Horses, says he’s thinking about starting a support group for the men in horse-crazy women’s lives the world over. I can just imagine it…Horse Husbands Anonymous (HHA) would offer an opportunity to commiserate, share stories, and perhaps pass on well-earned tips for success to others who dare to love women who love horses.

Maybe you need an HHA chapter near you?

Check out Menno as he demonstrates his prowess in the stable (and in the saddle) and talks about his absolutely terrific book. Women Are from Venus and So Are Their Horses is available from the TSB bookstore, where shipping in the US is always FREE.

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